Even though she has decided to wait a few years until her daughter is grown to reenter the dating scene, she's confused about how to proceed."When Madaline is out of the house I want to date, but I don't know how." Samantha has been divorced for only a year, but would like to start dating again even though her two boys are still in elementary school.
Jennifer's, Samantha's and John's concerns are common, because according to the U. Census Bureau, 19.3 million Americans get divorced each year, and many of them date and eventually remarry.
Perhaps you share their concerns, as you're also wondering how you can reenter the dating world after divorce — and do so according to God's standards. Divorce is the death of the dreams you had when you committed yourself "for better or for worse." As a Christian, you can't simply separate from your spouse one day and hit the dating field the next.
And as with any loss, big or small, time is needed to grieve and to reassess who you are, where you've been and where God wants you to go.
Healing is also necessary to follow God's command to" do unto others what you would have them do unto you," (Matthew ).
This may mean seeking out your pastor for support, joining a Divorce Recovery group or visiting a Christian counselor.
Some divorced church-goers try to convince themselves that God's command to abstain from sex doesn't apply to them — that it's for the never-married crowd.
However, Scripture is clear that it doesn't matter if someone has been married or not, sex with someone other than your spouse is still fornication (I Thessalonians 4:3, I Corinthians 6:9).
Don't wait to put some practical boundaries in place, such as not staying at your date's home overnight.
If you start dating prematurely, you could be hurting — rather than honoring — those you date.
When Becky was invited to lunch by a man she met at a bookstore, she was excited.
She was ready to date and had taken time to seek God and heal after her divorce three years earlier.