is committed to helping people deal with their grief by encouraging them to write to their deceased loved ones as a form of self-therapy.
We plan to give widows and widowers a view of both sides of the equation as a couple who have been through it successfully.
Here’s the backstory: I lost my wife of 22 years when I was 45.
We were childless and seeking to adopt the year before she died.
A few months earlier Wendy lost her husband of 10 years when she was 37 leaving her with two young children, then ten months and four and a half years.
LIFE PHASING LARRY: My first piece of advice to men of a certain age is Understand that throughout your life you are programmed to be attracted to the young and fertile, but unless you really want to raise a first or second family, get over it.
Young women who tell you they don’t really want to have kids are at best often kidding themselves and at worst, deceiving you. If you are 75 and feel great and are dating women in their early 60s, think about this: in ten years, they she will still feel great and you’ll be 85. It’s better to be in phase age-wise with your mate.
Despite their best intentions, many young women have a change of heart about having children as their biological clock ticks down. WENDY: Suddenly, single I found myself unsure of whom I was, and had to work thru an unexpected personal rediscovery period, a second adolescence of sorts.
It was unsettling for I thought I had finished with all of that years ago.
What we shared in common was we both had clearly defined objectives—she wanted not only a husband but also a father for her children.
I wanted a wife, but also wanted to raise children.
Young widowers and widows may share these objectives. Widows often want someone to be a father to their children; many of the men have already done so, and aren’t in love with the idea.